Editor’s Note: Each Week During the Football Season Stand-Up Comedian and Co-Host of the Punch Drunk Sports Podcast, Jayson Thibault, picks games against the flips of a John F. Kennedy Half-Dollar. 

The Contestants

Jayson Thibault is a stand-up comedian and original member of the Punch Drunk Sports Podcast along with Air Shaffir and Sam Tripoli.  On Nov. 27, Thibault will be recording his new comedy album, “Covidiot” during his performance at The Market Lounge & Comedy Club in Valparaiso, Indiana.  FTB is without question THE No. 1 Penn State football site in Northwest Indiana, so far all our readers in the area (Brian) be sure to check him out! 

The JFK Half-Dollar Coin was first minted in 1964. This particular 50-cent piece we’re flipping has been in the cup holder of a 2015 Toyota Camry for some time and is a tad sticky. If it picks winners, we’re not going to wash it. If it doesn’t, we’re spending it.   

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One Last Look at Saturday’s Mess – This Time With an Eye on the Nittany Lions Defense – Before We Bury The Ball, Burn the Tape, and Convince Ourselves the Season Can Still be Salvaged. 

FTB CHARTING – BOX SCORE

Just let this sink in…if Devyn Ford does the right/smart thing and belly flops on the 3-yard-line, Penn State’s defense would have held Indiana to less than 150 total yards of offense.

(Stares into space for 3 minutes…)

I’m too tired/still-not-over-Saturday to type something clever about that stat, so let’s just get to the damn review. 

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It’s Not the Debut We All Expected, but the Show Must Go On. Film Shows Plenty of Room for Improvement and Plenty of Reasons to be Optimistic.

FTB CHARTING – BOX SCORE 

For those expecting us to spew venom for the next 1,900 words, you got the wrong blog. 

Because for as frustrating as Penn State’s bed-wetting in Bloomington was on Saturday, the offense wasn’t the 1970 Gremlin sporting a duct-taped bumper many message-board Marthas (we’re taking back Karen for all the Karens out there) claimed it to be. 

Kirk Ciarrocca’s Lions gained 488 total yards against a veteran defense. In 2019, Penn State failed to reach that yardage mark in 9 of 13 games. Two of the games they did (Idaho and Maryland) shouldn’t even count. So just calm down and let us offer some perspective. Film review shows the offensive line fluctuated between Very Good to Dominant – despite a lot of negativity heaped on this group after the game, the Penn State skill players were pedestrian at best, and Sean Clifford was Sean Clifford.

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This was not the opponent that Penn State wanted to see for its season opener. Not in any season, really, but certainly not this (insert whatever adjectives you’re using to describe 2020 these days) season.

Indiana, the punchy punchline of the Big Ten. Maybe someday someone will come along and lead the Hoosiers to back-to-back-to-back conference titles, and they’ll smack around Alabama in a playoff game, and the five-stars will flock to Bloomington. Until that day arrives, though, Indiana is not a name that will be taken seriously among fans of other Big Ten programs. On the contrary, people will expect Indiana to find new and creative ways to hand opponents the game, because, well, that’s what Indiana does.

The Nittany Lions themselves had little reason to take the Hoosiers lightly after getting healthy scares last season (34-27) and the season before (33-28), but players hear the Indiana jokes, and they know who they’re playing next week.

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Editor’s Note: Each Saturday FTB will release rapid, unfiltered stream on consciousness notes after every Penn State game. We picked a helluva day to debut this segment, huh?

• I really don’t know how that last 2-point conversion (ruled a successful try) isn’t overturned. YOU COULD NOT HAVE A BETTER CAMERA ANGLE! If I was an Indiana fan, and I saw the initial replay, the first words out of my mouth would have been, “Ugh, we lost.” If Sean Clifford was the one carrying the ball, the first words out of my mouth would have been, “Ugh, we lost.” What exactly am I missing here?
• Franklin’s running back rotation continues to make absolutely NO SENSE.  Caziah Holmes gets benched for a fumble that isn’t a fumble. Keyvonne Lee flashes a hot hand in the 2nd quarter then he’s exiled until the 4th. BUT Devyn Ford makes a completely bonehead and SELFISH play, and he’s out there to start overtime.
• I hated the play on 2nd and inches with 11 seconds left in regulation. Hand the ball off and get 3-5 yards! Penn State was out of timeouts, but a first down pauses the clock temporarily, leaving more than enough time to spike and send the FG team out. The line to gain is literally inches away. Instead Ciarrocca calls a play with .0001 percent chance of success. Stout kicks a FG 2 yards shy of being good. Seems like those extra yards via the handoff might have mattered.

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Editor’s Note: Each week during the season, the FTB Staff will release its scouting report on Penn State’s upcoming opponent. Normally, these blogs will be posted at 11 a.m. EST Thursday and Friday…but we’re a little premature this week. Hey, happens to the best of us.  

Despite Tom Allen’s undeniable enthusiasm (see above) coaching defense at Indiana isn’t always the most pleasant experience. Even last season, the Hoosiers’ winningest campaign since 1993, Indiana ended a pedestrian 9th among Big Ten teams in Scoring Defense (24.4 Pts/Gm), Total Defense (352.2 Yds/Gm), and Sacks (25). No Indiana player on this side of the ball made any All-Big Ten teams last season. 

 To Allen’s credit – and to a lesser degree DC Kane Wommack’s credit, although Allen’s thumbprint is on everything the Hoosiers do defensively – he squeezes all the juice out of players who are juuust a few inches too short or juuust a few pounds too light to play on bigger stages than the community theater that is Memorial Stadium.

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Editor’s Note: Each Week During the Football Season Stand-Up Comedian and Co-Host of the Punch Drunk Sports Podcast, Jayson Thibault, picks games against the flips of a John F. Kennedy Half-Dollar. 

The Contestants

Jayson Thibault is a stand-up comedian and original member of the Punch Drunk Sports Podcast along with Air Shaffir and Sam Tripoli.  On Nov. 27, Thibault will be recording his new comedy album, “Covidiot” during his performance at The Market Lounge & Comedy Club in Valparaiso, Indiana.  FTB is without question THE No. 1 Penn State football site in Northwest Indiana, so far all our readers in the area (Brian) be sure to check him out! 

The JFK Half-Dollar Coin was first minted in 1964. This particular 50-cent piece were flipping has been in the cup holder of a 2015 Toyota Camry for some time and is a tad sticky. If it picks winners, we’re not going to wash it. If it doesn’t, we’re spending it.  

Continue reading