Dispensing Thoughts & Opinions: Penn State vs. Iowa

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• Well, this is the risk you knowingly take when you construct a beautiful sand castle so close to the edge of the beach during high tide. In the blink of an eye, it can all violently wash away. Penn State’s inability to land a competent backup in the Transfer Portal, (or its misguided assessment of its current quarterback situation beyond Sean Clifford) meant the 2021 season would always be a heartbeat away – or in this case, a wrapped right shoulder away – from flatlining.

• Granted, Ta’Quan Roberson was dropped into an unenviable scenario – on the road, at Kinnick, facing a desperate crowd searching for any reason to use (and likely by now, lose) its collective voice. In the Big Ten, that’s pretty much the deepest of deep ends…but, good lord, Roberson did NOT look prepared for the moment. Took about 4 seconds to figure that out after the third-year, former 4-star belly-flopped on a bobbled snap. From there, Roberson piecemealed together a clunky 3^rd Quarter scoring drive full of Sandlot scrambles and dump offs. Sure, those 3 points upped the Nittany Lions’ lead to 20-10 but they also revealed to Iowa DC Phil Parker that this hobbled offense was no longer a threat to do anything downfield or capable of completing levels concepts (like Clifford did repeatedly in the first half) that put Iowa’s zone defenders in damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don’t conflict scenarios.

• So now what? Good question, Lazy Transition Device. Nice of you to pop in here, btw. Apologies for copping out by tossing out this worthless non-answer, but it’s impossible to know until the severity of Clifford’s injury (injuries?) gets announced…which it won’t be unless whatever ails the 5^th-year senior is a worse-than-it-appears career closer. So, I guess we’ll know in two weeks. If Clifford is cool and able to rub some dirt on his bum throwing shoulder then the only thing that changes – at least from a winning the conference/making the CFP perspective – is that there’s no longer any wiggle room. Another loss ends that pipedream. Conversely, an upset at Ohio State and a strong November surge should setup Penn State with a welcomed mulligan against the Hawkeyes in the Big Ten Championship. Given the excusable circumstances of this loss to Iowa, I can’t imagine a scenario where a one-loss Big Ten champion Penn State gets left out of the dance.

• But what if Clifford isn’t cool? Then what? Illinois seems winnable. So does Rutgers. That’s about it.

• Given the exploitative nature of college football, it’s always been a little cringey (to us, anyway) when one fan base claims to be more righteous than another fan base. With that said, we got no qualms with Penn State Twitter absolutely BLASTING Iowa fans for booing when Nittany Lions got up slowly today. What the heck are you booing exactly, Ray Kinsella? The corn you sold to buy season tickets grows faster than Iowa’s offensive tempo, so just chill out. Your huddles just got longer. That’s it. What strategic advantage does Penn State gain from having All-Big Ten locks Jaquan Brisker and Arnold Ebiketie sit out a play? When did these loveable, kill-em-with-kindness Kinnick patrons turn heel and spew venom?

• Does Roberson’s CLAP sound different than Clifford’s CLAP? Not trying to be funny here. Dead serious. Is it fainter? Duller? Higher-pitched? It’s gotta be something, right? Because how else do you explain Penn State’s pre-snap implosion for 2.5 quarters? 8 (EIGHT!) False Starts. It’s not like Tom Arnold and his sketchy (we’re assuming) relatives suddenly decided to get loud once Roberson entered the game. Clifford and the offensive line surfed those same soundwaves like Kelly Slater early on, so not sure why Juice Scruggs and Co. kept wiping out when Roberson entered the action.

• Defense was the defense – inspiring to watch. Running game was the running game – torture to watch.

• The fact that Dramamine doesn’t sponsor FOX’s never-steady Umpire Cam might be the biggest marketing miss of modern times. Felt like I needed an airplane bag each time the guys in the truck cut to that nauseating view.